March , 30 2005 (Dream, and Health Beliefs)
March 28, 2005 (Weekly Horoscope)
Sagittarius Horoscope for 3/28 - 4/3 |
| This week's scenario is highlighted by opportunities which arise for you to turn your creative imagination and knowledge into tangible achievements. This would be a good time to draw, paint, write or design plans, as other people are inspired by your ideas and sensitivity. You have distinct impressions which prove remarkably accurate. Even if you feel a bit introspective or reclusive now, your instinct will direct you to bring form to your inherent talents. You also have much to offer to people who are confined or hospitalized now in the form of guidance and compassion. You speak very clearly, convincingly, and forcefully now, so that there is no mistaking what your views and opinions are. You can argue a good case, make a very persuasive presentation, or successfully challenge someone whose ideas do not agree with your own. Your mind is sharp and your responses quick. This is a very good time to take a test or to do any kind of intellectual or mental work. This horoscope provided by Astrology Source. Learn about your inner self, friends, and lovers. |
March 27, 2005 (New Elias Session)
March 24, 2005 (new session)
March 24, 2005 (Terri Schiavo and a dream)
March 22, 2005 (Dream)
March 19, 2005 (One of those days)
Transformation. Transcendance. Metamorphasis.
March 18, 2005 (Dream)
March 18, 2005
March 17, 2005 (Dream)
I dreamt about a biker with long black hair with white streaks through it. He and I had some kind of relationship, but something happened, and we were splitting apart. He was being very cold to me, and I was upset because we had been close. We were at a party and he saw another guy trying to talk to me and he got mad, so he pushed me against a wall, and started touching me only to get my reaction and when I reacted he walked away. I felt empty.
Here Is Gone
by the Goo Goo Dolls
You and I got something
But it's all and then it's nothing to me - yeah
And I got my defenses
When it comes to your intentions for me - yeah
And we wake up in the breakdown
Of the things we never thought we could be -
yeah
I'm not the one who broke you
I'm not the one you should fear
What do you got to move you darling
I thought I lost you somewhere
But you were never really ever there at all
And I want to get free
talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be all you need
Somehow here is gone
I have no solution
To the sound of this pollution in me - yeah
And I was not the answer
So forget you ever thought it was me - yeah
I'm not the one who broke you
I'm not the one you should fear
What do you got to move you darling
I thought I lost you somewhere
But you were never really ever there at all
And I want to get free
talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be all you need
Somehow here is gone
And I don't need the fallout
Of all the past that's here between us
And I'm not holding on
And all your lies weren't enough to keep me here
And I want to get free
talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be all you need
Somehow here is gone
And I want to get free
talk to me
I can feel you falling
I know it's out there
I know it's out there
I can feel you falling
I know it's out there
I know it's out there
Somehow here is gone- yeah
I know it's out there
I know it's out there
Somehow here is gone- yeah
March 15, 2005 (Dream)
March 14, 2005 (The Singer of Intuition)
Perceptiveness. Oracular powers. Awareness. Trust
March 13, 2005 (Dream)
March 13, 2005 (Feeling icky)
March 12, 2005 (Group Chat)
You can email me for more details on how to join the chats once you have messenger.
March 10, 2005 (Dream)
All I have are a few fragments of last nights dream. I remember I was feeding some cats, and I saw a stray long haired, white, cat with some black spots in the yard, (this was not my yard) so I put some food on a plate for it, but when I went to give the food to the cat it was on the other side of a field. As I started walking toward it the farther away it seemed to get, until I was halfway across the field. That is when I noticed what looked to be like white animal skins all around me. The tops were clean but underneath there was some blood.
I then noticed that there were some strange looking creatures* where the cat was. They looked like a mix between pigs and anteaters. They were furless and had white skin, similar to a white rhino. I looked around at all the animal skins around me, and then I got nervous, and I wanted to get back to the house, so I started running thinking that the pigs were chasing me. I think I woke up before anything else could happen.
I do remember a little more about what happened earlier in the dream like, I was in a school cafeteria wearing a "Boston University" sweatshirt that was too big for me, but it is so fragmented I am not even going to write it down unless more comes back to me.
*This is not the first time I dreamt of these pig-like creatures. I dreamt about them about 3 years ago too, but that time their skin was gray instead of white.
March 9, 2005 (Horoscope)
March 8, 2005 (Luathas the Wild and a dream)
Detachment from ego
Power to regenerate that which is lost
Facing fear
Controlling dreams
Moving in the otherworld
I will have to think about what a dead lizard means to me.
We have to be careful with Luathas. He doesn't know the meaning of words like: slow, stop, rest, respite, catnap, moderation, gradual, pace, gentle, ease, peace. These are all things that humans must know in order to live creatively and constructively with him. Anything else is fatal, sooner or later--probably sooner at that.
The fire of Luathas can be destructive as well as creative. Rage, fury, and anger are all part of the fire element as well. Fire burns as well as energizes. Think of the gentle warmth of a full and sleeping kitten, its inner fire converting milk to bone and muscle and to extravagant friskiness; or the flame of the candle, lighting the wanderer's way home; or the anger of a hurt soul, lashing out at others; or the inferno of a forest fire, wild and overpowering.
Creation and destruction are inextricably linked. The fire that burns creates ash, which in turn acts as fertilizer for new growth. The slopes of volcanoes are highly fertile, which is why people take the risk of living on and farming them.
Think of the Phoenix, who lays her egg, and then bursts into flame to incubate it. Birth, death, and rebirth are the cycle of fire.
March 7, 2005 (Resistance is Futile: You Will be Loved)
As we suggested, love is not something that you acquire like so much merchandise off the supermarket shelves. It is not something you bargain for. It is something that is innate to human nature. And we know that this statement may be considered outrageous because of the deeply ingrained social conditions that man's true innate nature is to kill, destroy, maim, rape, pillage. But that is the lie and the result of fear of love and loving and being loved, in other words the fear of being assimilated by your own nature.
Thus it is important to actually get an understanding of the innate goodness and love that resides within the human heart. And indeed when you see phenomenon like the factory workers or the chicken farms or any other mistreatment of animals or infants or human beings, partners abusing each other, nations assaulting each other, family members killing each other, one country waging war and wholesale slaughter against your neighbor, you look at these things and you nod your head in agreement, 'yes, here is a clear and irrefutable evidence that Man, Humankind, is nothing but cruelty in its collective heart.'
And then there is further agreement that some divine forces should come and clean up the family tree and trim it of all homosapiens. And such thoughts and perceptions are taken as fact because there is apparent evidence. And many if not most people rarely take the time to investigate why these things are happening. Is it merely beliefs in duplicity? Or is it beliefs in good and evil? Or is it political rambling and gain by greed?
All of these appear to be factors indeed, but the greatest misunderstanding, indeed the greatest sin of all is that you have been given a lie, and that lie is that the human heart is filled with shame and iniquity and is therefore flawed. And of course then out of this quagmire the human individual can do nothing else but destroy the Earth and each other.
And yet there is indeed a solution, a SIMPLE solution to such lies that those in positions of knowing swallow their damn pride and reveal the truth that the human heart, the human individual is born into the world already filled with loving capacities that merely need to be nurtured as opposed to the deceitful belief that the human individual comes into the world tainted, soiled, and must be restrained to keep the evil within his or her heart locked up lest it destroy the world.
And everywhere you look you can see the evidence reflected back to you according to what you accept to believe about your human nature, and that is the key. You do not see war, destruction, wholesale slaughter because it is man's innate nature. You see it because this is what you believe.
Now, accept to RELEASE such beliefs and replace them with the conviction that your fragile human nature knows only of a boundless, fearless and heroic loving state of grace and love and IMAGINE what you will then see reflected as evidence of your convictions.
Now it is one thing to imagine this and it is one thing to hear this from our inimitable, controversial lips, but to understand the delicious implications can indeed turn your world around. And one of the second most lies attributed to the nature of human individuals is that your very creature hood, your very sexual nature must also be controlled because it is dangerous and it cannot not lead you to redeem your tainted or soiled selves or souls and must therefore be diametrically opposed to your spiritual quest for salvation, which is another bad bill of goods being pushed your way. They are all interwoven.
And this the greatest disservice to your race is the lie disguised as spiritual truth that your loving nature and your sexual nature are incompatible. They are instead quite compatible and a loving expression of each other. And though there are certain philosophies that teach that the way to redeem yourselves is to literally stamp out your desiring nature and your sexual nature. Though there are such philosophies, we do not know if you have ever heard of them, but there are.
Such philosophies eventually end up causing far more psychological damage to the adept or disciple because you are attempting, such philosophies are attempting to convince you that your own innate nature is filled with dangers, is filled with evils, and may very well lead you to damnation. It literally creates a form of psychic schizophrenia.
Before such philosophies were enforced and before your ancestors were enjoined, often by force to subscribe to such convictions, there were perceptions, there were philosophical schools and systems from very ancient age and times where humankind was not ashamed of its creature hood, of its sexuality, nor of its spirituality, and there was no need to separate the two.
Now it is often assumed that if that were the case then obviously people must have been fornicating at every street corner. How could legitimate business be carried on with everyone fornicating everywhere? (Laughter) But that only shows a disparaging paradigm in the thinker's own belief structures and nothing more. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Once a society understands the proper principles of action by a loving sexual spirituality or a loving spiritual sexuality, then you have a society that is no longer in need to create schizophrenic paradigms at the collective level. You do not need Victorianism or any other related attitudes such as you often have in many governments around the world where it is permissible to kill, maim, steal, rob, but do not dare have a sexual indiscretion of any kind because that is unacceptable because it is acceptable to everything else.
So when you have a society that seeks to instill a stronger moral code, then you know that society is in deeper trouble than assumed, when factions of such societies insist that moral standings must prevail. In other words, the appearances must be uppermost and the animal nature of your being must be suppressed, then you are in deep trouble. When the so called religious rights of any sect and cult, whether it is a backyard cult or a global cult, whether it is disguised in the form of Christianity, Judaism or any other cult, Muslim, Jaïn or anything else, then you have distortions about your human nature that seek to be prevalent, and your true nature is to be buried.
You do not have to search far and wide for the reasons why your societies can be in the mess that they are and this is part of the truth wave in the shift of consciousness, the collective realization that there is not a damned thing wrong with your souls or spirits, there is something wrong with those who try to sell you that lie. And ultimately they can only sell you what you want to be sold. So this created a loop, does it not?
But the more that you awaken to the love and the light and the sexual expressions within your being, the more aware, awake and realized you become. That is the meaning of enlightenment. It has nothing to do with sitting on the top of a mountain contemplating the lint in your naval. (Laughter) That is not enlightenment. Those who may claim that they are enlightened because they have eschewed [shunned] their human nature have not embraced their human nature. They cannot embrace your human nature and do not know the wherewithal of what they speaketh.
When love becomes the primal force, and we are not talking of the love that again certain cults and sects would like to promote such as the apparent love of a deity that allowed its own child to be murdered as warranted in any respect, we are speaking about an actual love that can only come from an understanding of your own human nature, loving that human nature and being able to see that same loving nature within another because the other again is you.
How can anyone stand at the pulpit and claim to LOVE ALL except them [pointing in different directions] and except them and not them? That is another distortion. You cannot claim in the same breath to love the Divine or all that is divine and hate physical expressions of the Divine. Does that not make sense?
And how can you love others, seeing them through the eyes of the Divine? By accepting that your own nature through and through with all if the apparent flaws and even the wrinkles beside the eyes, the beautiful and loving expression of All That Is and out of the core of your being there can be an outpouring of this acceptance, accepting your own creature hood, your own sexual and spiritual nature in order to be able to accept it in the other. If you cannot accept it within you, how can you possibly accept it in the other and demand that the other accept it in you?
And once there is an acceptance and recognition and an awakening and an enlightenment upon such a sweaty topic, then you change, your neighborhood changes, your community changes, your culture changes. Until eventually your whole world itself is transformed. This kind of recognition and acceptance can actually take the war out of humankind. And there were many ancient practices where this was done to purge the individual, the soldier, the warrior.
In such a society matriarchal systems were very much in place and understood for the values it brought. There was an understanding that the male cannot rule without the healing of the female. Once that aspect of the human psyche was restrained and collectively stripped of its healing and nurturing abilities and relegated to the kitchen and the baby factories then Mankind lost its perspective and became overly laden with testosterone.
There is now resurgence and a return to such views. And gradually you will keep seeing changes at that level, but this will take time. It is said that by the third quarter of this century many things will be accomplished by the return of the Christ entity, and indeed this entity, she has many things to do. (Laughter)
Now though there is no specific gender characterization at essence level, and though many people still assume the return of the Christ and the Christ entity itself unquestionably must be male, we might suggest you think again. The entity is nurturing and in your terms has definite feminine characteristics because there is indeed a great need for balance and harmony at that level.
And that is why it is important for everyone that hears this and everyone that will read this for years to come, it is important that you recognize that it is only by healing your human nature as we have described in this rather heady discussion, and that as the years and decades go by you may indeed see a return to ancient practices that incorporate long forgotten traditions of spiritual and sexual practices. And these traditions have never died but have been submerged deep within the human psyche. But they are resurfacing when there is the time and the need.
So do not think that somehow or other you cannot be spiritual and sexual at the same time. When properly perceived, your sexual or spiritual moods can indeed be experienced as two facets of the very same coin. Your perspective makes the difference. You can continue to see that anything about your sexuality somehow or other goes against spirituality, but that is your perception. It is not a fact. Or you can see that indeed the loving flow one to the other and that quite like the greatest spiritual expression you can engage in is when you are at your most sexual and vice versa. So it is a matter of perception and perspective and what you enjoin yourself to perceive at that moment. continue...
March 5, 2005 (Dream)
March, 5, 2005 (Happy Birthday Nikki!)
My sister is my heart.
She opens doors to rooms
I never knew were there,
Breaks through walls
I don't recall building.
She lights my darkest corners
With the sparkle in her eyes.
My sister is my soul.
She inspires my wearied spirit
To fly on wings of angels
But while I hold her hand
My feet never leave the ground.
She stills my deepest fears
With the wisdom of her song.
My sister is my past.
She writes my history
In her eyes I recognize myself,
Memories only we can share.
She remembers, she forgives
She accepts me as I am
With tender understanding.
My sister is my future.
She lives within my dreams
She sees my undiscovered secrets,
Believes in me as I stumble
She walks in step beside me,
Her love lighting my way.
My sister is my strength
She hears the whispered prayers
That I cannot speak
She helps me find my smile,
Freely giving hers away
She catches my tears
In her gentle hands.
My sister is like no one else
She's my most treasured friend
Filling up the empty spaces
Healing broken places
She is my rock, my inspiration.
Though impossible to define,
In a word, she is...my sister.
-- Lisa Lorden
March 2, 2005 (Liturgy for Lilith)
Liturgy for Lilith
I am Lilith, Grandmother of Mary Magdalene
I am Lilith, whose sexual fire was too hot for God.
I am Lilith, the First Woman, who chose the rage of exile over the cancer Of servitude.
I am Lilith, Mother to the Mother-less.
I am Lilith, whose blood covers the moon.
I am Lilith, standing on owl’s claws at a woman’s crossroads.
I am Lilith, the Whore in the gateway of the Temple.
I am Lilith, whose serpentine tongue caused Eve to laugh, and pick the apple!
I am Lilith, Revolving Sword of Flame – scorching hypocrisy from truth’s white bones.
I am Lilith, free-moving in the Wilderness.
I am Lilith, spirit of night and air.
I am Lilith, in whose dark caves transgressors find sanctuary.
I am Salome.
I am Morgan le Faye.
I am the Queen of Shayba –
My hair is black, and I am ‘dark but comely’,
(Solomon sang my song!).
My hair is red and my skin, ivory.
I am Eve’s big sister.
I am Lilith, Mother to the motherless.
I am Lilith, whose sexual fire was too hot for God.
I am Lilith, living in the Shadow.
Waiting. For you.
-- Fabian
March 1, 2005 (Losing My Sight, Losing My Mind, Wish Somebody Would Tell me I'm Fine...)
March 1, 2005 (Stop Crying Your Heart Out)
Stop Crying Your Heart Out by Oasis
From the movie "The Butterfly Effect"
Hold up
Hold on
Don't be scared
You'll never change what's been and gone
May your smile (may your smile)
Shine on (shine on)
Don't be scared (don't be scared)
Your destiny may keep you warm
'Cos all of the stars are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them someday
Take what you need and be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Get up (get up)
Come on (come on)
Why're you scared (I'm not scared)
You'll never change what's been and gone
'Cos all of the stars are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them someday
Take what you need and be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
(Ahh ahh ahh)
(Ahh ahh)
'Cos all of the stars are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them someday
Take what you need and be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
We're all of us stars
We're fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see us someday
Just take what you need and be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out

